Where we are

So clearly I have done a poor job at keeping this blog up!! Projects got in the way and life got hectic. :) I ended a couple of my direct sell businesses and have started a new venture with my husband, more on that later. Currently we are beginning our 9th IVF cycle. I have vowed to share our journey this time. In the past I have kept them personal and only shared bits and pieces but this time is probably our last cycle and for those who will be entering this journey in the coming months, I want you to know you aren't alone, contact me if you need support- I'll help you the best I can or guide you to the things that have helped me. For the friends and family who are simply curious about In-vitro fertilization, I hope to document it well for you, yes it may get uncomfortable for you. It is what it is and no holds barred this time. E.V.E.R.Y bit will be shared. If vaginas, semen, and penises make you uncomfortable then please do not read any further because these will be blogged about in the future weeks. We're beginning our 9th cycle. It's bittersweet. If this doesn't work it is the last retrieval insurance will cover, due to the Illinois Mandate. There is a lot riding on every cycle but this one has additional emotions tied to it. This is the cycle that if it completely fails we move on to adoption, if it partly works we stay in limbo for a few more months until we can do a Frozen Embryo Transfer (FET) and possibly a few more months if that one fails and we still have frozen embies, and if it works we end up pregnant and I hold my breath for the next 9 almost 10 months and pray like the Dicken's that it isn't nearly as traumatic as my first IVF miracle's was. Yes there is a lot riding on this cycle, emotions will run higher than normal. So what's going on at this point? Well a decision was made, a call was placed, a meeting was scheduled. 13 vials of blood have been drawn, and results V.E.R.Y s.l.o.w.l.y. trickled in only to find out we missed 3 so back to the hospital I go this week. More calls were scheduled, documents sent, appointments scheduled, a notary found, at some point this week docs will be signed and notarized (wow I REALLY miss my friend & former boss when it comes to Notarizing!), more blood will be drawn, and more tests run. 1 prescription has been started and finished, 2 more are on the counter waiting on dawn to be started. A call will be placed to our former clinic regarding getting our frozen semen couriered from them to the new clinic and a call to the Urologist to schedule Tony's Tese, (a biopsy gun is used to extract semen, I've been told it's comparable to a vasectomy, he has this each time I have a retrieval). I'm waiting on Aunt Flo to arrive in order to proceed with treatment. She is a much anticipated and welcome visitor around here during IVF cycles. She's great at staying away unless called upon, this is a blessing and a curse!! Did I mention calls had been placed? There are always quite a few calls and emails but we are starting with a new clinic 3 hours away which means extra phone calls. After our move I spent HOURS contemplating what to do as far as clinics were concerned. I knew we only had one retrieval left and I had reservations about our former clinic, please do not take this as me slamming them or speaking negatively of them, I just wasn't sure it was where I wanted my last cycle and being comfortable with and trusting your team is half of the battle. One particularly hard night (there are more of these than I care to count) , in the middle of the night , I was perusing message boards and stumbled upon the fact that our FAVORITE reproductive nurse had been moved to the clinic I was contemplating. There was no more question in my mind what we were going to do or where we were going. I haven't done a cycle without her and the thought of going through one without her terrified me.!. I always know I can count on her, whether it's just knowing she's there, the pharmacy has screwed up meds or the fridge in our hotel room has frozen my meds, she is ALWAYS there, it really means the world to me to be able to count on my medical team. I loved the staff at our former office and will miss them immensely but I know we're going where we're suppose to be and I'm excited about the change. Texts have been sent to secure care for B while I'm receiving treatment. I started looking into this last July once we were somewhat settled into our house, for various reasons Tony has held off, I'm not blaming him he had valid reasons but each month I've slipped a little farther into a depression, I'm ready to move on with life one way or another, waiting and waiting and waiting has been extremely tough. It has drawn out feelings and emotions that need to be processed but can't fully be processed until we are finished with IVF. This journey has been long, 6 years long. An end is in sight and for that I am grateful! We covet any prayers or good thoughts you wish to send our way! I'll update more when there is more to share. Until next time.... Jen